An Open Letter to His Colleagues at B'Tselem from the Most Decent, Honorable, Good, Humble Person I Have Had the Honor to Know: Musa AbuHashash of Fawwar Camp, Hebron

August 15, 2014

In Blog

Dear Hagai
Dear colleagues,,

رسالة مفتوحة من الباحث موسى ابو هشهش قي منظمة بيتسلم الى زملائه !!!

An open letter:………………….... so far so good……………………..……………………

Once a MAN fell off the 60th floor of a high building and on his way down,someone watching through his window in the second floor, asked the poor man,”How are you?” The falling man answered: So far so good,
SO, far so good,We all could repeat,while we are falling..Yes ,WE ARE ALL FALLING, and the crash is not farther than the distance from the second floor to the hard and solid street..
I feel it and you may feel it too. I feel as if everything is falling> hope,dignity, humanity,and above all the human rights community to which we claim we belong. For myself, and for the past weeks I suffered from a sort of mind paralysis that made me stuck before television all night watching the burned children ,the massive destruction and the news of whole families buried under the rubble.
I now ask WHY? and IN WHOSE NAME WHAT HAPPENS IS HAPPENING? Doesn’t it happen in the name of the good Israelis and in your name? The most moral army and most professional and the forth strongest in the world are killing hundreds of children and hundreds of women and old people and the claim is to defend the Israeli people to defend YOU. But, who will defend the children in GAZA and how?
Imagine, if it were these numbers of Israeli children and women and old people killed by whatever army,what would the reaction be. For me, I claim, I would feel more free and run in the streets shouting: :shame . I would tell every one to stop standing neutral and paralyzed as neutrality in this case is almost treason and disgrace.
Yesterday I stood near the body of the 11 year old child from Fawwar refugee camp who was killed with bullet in front of his home and started to take pictures of the deep;y sleeping child<in flash light of my camera, ,the child’s eyes sparkled and at moment I was scared. I felt as if his eyes wanted to say something< to ask me the question which I always wanted to a avoid being asked: ‘WHY are you here? Why are taking pictures of me?> what will you do with my pictures Hundreds of questions in one second. Me, no answer ,but, feeling helpless and even guilty. I admit that because he was there, I was there to take pictures………………….……………….
I was still there, in the hospital,when the doctor came to examine the body and write a report. I asked the doctor if I stay and take pictures of the child’s wounds and I explained that was VERY important for the investigation.The doctor laughed- it was not a place and time for laughing- and asked ‘What investigation? and to which court?
Then , he closed the door behind him.
For me.and for a long time I thought being SMART more than RIGHT, could help in our work in human rights, but it seems that I was wrong…Being smart would not help in the massive killing of innocent children Being sbare would not help in destroying whole neighborhoods in Gaza and killing sleeping people, and being smart would not help in using live bullets to disperse protests and cause serious injuries to hundreds of children and young men in West bank
I said it the other day in in the goodbye party to Jessica that once we stop behaving like teachers and feel we are victims , the we can claim we may change . AND now I would say once we stop being smart, we can stop the inevitable fall.
Dear friends
I am tired of feeling helpless and guilty.I cannot sleep of this nightmare. I do not feel safe, neither do my children and fellowmen. ,and like most Palestinians who have reduced their expectations to the minimum I am left with one wish , that is the child from Fawwar would be the last child I investigate.
In the end, I would like to quote James Balwin’s words to be a message to the Israeli people who many of the suffer like us. Baldwin said: ‘they won’t be free until we are free.’and last I do not want to say the poor man;’s words “SO FAR SO GOOD”